Everybody has a kooky cat lady in their
neighborhood.  You know... that frumpy,
nutty lady who feeds and takes in all the
neighborhood cats.  She's kinda' like this:

"Here KittyKittyKitty..."	"It's Halloween and mommy has special treatsies for you...."	"...and we can play all night while we're waiting for the trick-or-treaters"

(Here come some trick-or-treaters now. Maybe, by giving out chocolate, they will pay attention to my efforts to reduce the feline overpopulation problem.)	"Awww... and this one's after my own heart..dressed as a cat as well.  You look so cute!"	"Here you go sweetie, have a KitKat and please remember to spay or neuter your kitty."

"See Alouishes-ishus-ishus!  We're making a difference!"	"Oh yes we are...yes we are!"	(Frankly, I don't understand why some people think cats are dirty.  Isn't this the cleanest butthole you've ever seen?)

"Oh Alouishes... I hate people who hate cats .......and I hate people who mistreat sweetie-cats like you......if I could only have my way with them.......I'd like to mistreat them.........

...but she dreams about being like this:

HHHHHH..I..SSSS  HISS HISS SSSS!!!  CAT HATERS SUBMIT!!!

	Idiots!  Now you can clearly see the cunning subterfuge of my kooky cat lady existence.
	Silence!  It's no wonder a paltry imbecile cat- hater like you cannot understand the meaning of such decisive words as "paltry" and subterfuge".
	You have the intelligence of an ox!   I will flog you as I desire!
	HA!
	Oh yes, and because of your complete disdain for felines, you get the crappy Halloween candy... the very worst Halloween candy in existence...  PEANUT BUTTER TAFFY!!!
	Now, on all fours like the dog you are and eat your Halloween candy out of your doggie bowl!
	...while I take this opportunity to WHACK your sorry ASS!
	That's quite enough dreary sludge for you to attempt to eat.  I have a special place for you to go now.
	Come into my cement basement.  This is your new cold, dark dwelling - much like the one you have doomed all those shunned and slighted cats to.
	That'll teach him!  I'll whip him again in the morning.
	Whew!...but right now I must escape the wrath of his peanut butter taffy farts!  GOD those are cruel candies!
	Now don't forget to spay or neuter your pets... and please be kind to cats.... ...or any other animal for that matter... and for Christ's sake BUY QUALITY HALLOWEEN CANDY!

Fun Halloween Games:

Try and guess how much this cat weighs?????

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